Thursday, 17 December 2015

Open letter to my future wife


Dear Future Wife,

You do not know me yet, maybe you do, you could have seen me already but have no idea it's me. You are probably wondering why I am even writing to you. I find a lot of anxiety trying to craft the right sentences so I wouldn't be chastised for being boring. I may not be able to convey my thoughts, my feelings, my love in words, but do not underestimate me yet.

Whether you are reading this before you meet me or stumble upon it later, there are some things I would like you to know about me because someday, I am going to marry you. Whichever way, please remember to bring a copy of this letter to our wedding as it will be good laugh for our guests.

I am a compassionate and an intrepid fellow, qualities I know were inherent in me while growing up. I may not have admitted it as an inchoate child, but I have great respect for my mother and my father. Though we argue sometimes, I never lost my respect for them. My dad, though not perfect, treated my mom like a Queen. He never belittled her, he never second guessed her decisions, he stood by her all the time. His love is a perfect example for me and my siblings to follow.

My mother, she is a darling, she is the definition of the word "mama" as she encapsulates all the virtues of a good mother. She is beautiful as she is tender. She have set the bar as to the qualities of a good wife and mother so high that I sometimes feel that finding you might be asking for the impossible. Mama is my Queen, that's why, i am going to treat you like a Princess, so you'll know I was raised like Royalty.

I write this letter to you because very soon, I will approach my own turn at marriage as I grow older an wiser, I would want to be your husband. I truly want to be your husband. A husband that will love, cherish and make you feel always special because the way i love a woman is part of who I am and not dependant on who i am with.

Dear future wife, I have always imagined what you'll look like, are you curvy, short, tall, dark, Igbo, Yoruba, Chinese? You don't have to be perfect, you have to be worth it, because in my eyes, it won't matter what you wear, how/what you look like, how much you weigh, what is your past, or what you perceive to be your imperfections, it will all be beauty to me. Sure, I am a sucker for soulful eyes and nice spread of good dentition when a lady smiles, your body will never be what defines your beauty, but rather the lasting and important things. Your soul, your heart, your mind, these are where a woman's true essence is and these are the things I will fall in love with.

However, do not misinterpret me by thinking your body will go unnoticed by me. Instead I will worship your body as if I've been wandering the desert for 20 years and you are the blessing of a cool, wet spring. I will know every freckle on your physique and wonder at them as though they were constellations in the night sky. I will
glorify every inch of your skin with gentle caresses of fingertips and soft lips, greedy palms and a hungry tongue. Holding you close while you sleep each
night will be the reason that I can't wait to go to bed each night, and why I will dread leaving our bed each morning. I will watch your breath steady and listen to the inevitable sounds you will make in the twilight between slumber and dreaming. I will fall asleep with the familiar scent of
your hair and skin filling my nostrils. I
will hold you as close as possible, our
breath and hearts syncing up as we drift off. I pledge to never stop doing the little things for you.

When you have a bad day I commit to lay you down and massage the sinewy, stress-knotted areas of your neck, your back and anywhere else you carry your stress. I will cook with you (not for you, I'm not s very good cook, not like my big brother) as often as possible. We'll do bible studies together.

I'll give you random gifts, just because you deserve gifts everyday. If you're
scared of spiders, or any bugs really, I
will always get them for you. I will also
try to do huge romantic gestures too but I'm a huge awkward nerd so they will inevitable be really's just who I am. These are the truths
about how I will love you when i find you.

I can promise i won't be perfect, and I'm going to mess up... maybe a lot. But I will always love you and be committed to you. If we have arguments, I'll rather lose the argument than lose a partner. I won't hesitate to always say I'm sorry, no matter who's right or wrong.

I will be the one who will recognize your goodness. I will be the one who will respect you and appreciate your high moral standards. I will be the one who will admire the way you respect yourself. I will be the one to hold your
hand when you need affection. I will be the one to kiss your cheek when you feel lonely. I will be the one who will hold you when you need to feel secure, i am an activist, i will always stand, defend and protect you. I will be the
one who will comfort you in your sadness and share in your happiness. I will be the one who will be by your side as you bring our children into the world. I will be the one who will love you as if each day was our last together. All these i'll do because your soft touch will weaken me. Your eyes will enthrall me. Your beauty will mesmerize me. Your goodness will enamor me. Your virtues will captivate me. Your trust will engross me. Upon securing your trust, my heart, mind and soul will finally find peace and contentment.

What will draw me to you, more than anything else, however is your love for God. And your attempt to follow His will. Your continued faith and love for God, through the failures and the triumphs, through the laughter and the tears, will only increase my love for you. So, please continue to be patient and wait for me. We will soon meet and begin our life together. And with the grace of God, through faithful devotion and loving sacrife, we will attain eternal happiness in Heaven.

I know I’m making all these plans without considering you but I’ll be willing to change all or accept any modifications from you even though I pray you love them too.

Yours inevitably,
Aluzu Ebikebuna A.

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